Puraan | 9-Bhavishya Puraan | 1-Braahm Parv
|5-Men and Women|
This section, Braahm Parv, is on p 1-222 of the book and mostly contains information about Soorya.
(Chap 8-9) Braahmaa Jee said - "Hey Muni, Now I tell you about the men and women as what they should do after getting married properly. First a Grihasth should find a house in such a country where he could live safely guard his wife and wealth. With out house one cannot protect both. Both of these - wealth and wife, are the means of three purposes (Dharm, Arth, Kaam), that is why one must protect them. Purush, place and house - these three are called Aashraya. These three protect wealth and earn money. A man of noble decent, intelligent, truth speaking, polite, religious is good for Aashraya. One should live in a city where religious people live. One should take undisputed land to build his house. One should live far from city's gate, Yagya Shaalaa, sculptors' dwelling places, gambling places, king's palace, king's servants' dwelling places etc. A house's slope should be toward east or north. Kitchen, bathroom, place for cows, inner rooms all should be build separately.
Trusted people should be appointed to guard inner rooms. By not guarding women, Varnsankar are born and other kinds of ill-wills arise. One should never give freedom to women, nor trust them, but outwardly one should behave alike. They should normally be appointed for cooking only. Women should not sit idle any time. Poverty, extra-ordinary beauty, company of bad people, going out with bad women, liberty, liking of talking, excessive Teerth traveling or going to Devtaa Darshan, excessive separation from husband, excessive talking to men, either being too much cruel, or too much soft or too much fearless, being under control of some other woman - these all are the roots of a woman's destruction.
This is a man's inability if he cannot control his women or servants. Whatever the means, a wife should be kept under control. Woman is the half part of man, that is why one should always respect his wife, and never oppose her. There are three types of women - the best, medium and mean. The best woman should be controlled by Saam and Daam; a medium woman should be controlled by Daam and Bhed; and the mean woman should be controlled by Bhed and Dand policies, but even after punishing her one should please her by Saam and Daam. Whoever woman wishes bad for her husband and has illicit relations with other men, she should be left alone."
Brahmaa Jee further said - "I told you that how men should behave with their women, now I tell you how women should behave with their husbands. If a woman pleases her husband, then she gets his love, children and Moksh too. All Karm should be done methodically, and method can be known by Shaastra. Women have no rights to read Shaastra, nor they can read any other book, that is why ruling by women is harmful. She needs to know about everything from others. First she knows from her husband, then after he death of the husband her son tells all that. Leaving all logical alternatives, one should follow only his elders' footprints, that is beneficial to her. Pativrataa woman is the root of all Grihasth Dharm."
Conduct for Women
(Chap 10-15) Brahmaa Jee further said - "The principal Dharm of a Pativrataa woman is to obey her husband and do as he likes her to do. She should respect husband's elders and love the younger ones. One should not cut jokes even with those people, like husband's younger brothers and friends, with whom she can laugh, while sitting alone with them. Sitting alone with any man, talking to him excessively, free behavior with him is not good, because fearlessness and freeness of a woman becomes an invitation for a man to misbehave with her. Whoever man makes bad signs and talks vulgar talks, one should abandon him completely.
Agreeing an unjust request of an evil person, pay attention to his humorous talks, giving or taking anything from their hands, all are prohibited. Standing on the door of her house, going through many men, laughing and talking loudly, moving hands excessively while talking are not good for a woman. She should consider her husband as her god and serve him by mind, speech and action. She should consider herself his half part and thus cooperate fully with him. She should care for her husband's food, clothing, resting time, entertaining his guests, etc. She has two main things - her dwelling house and her own body, therefore she should take care for both properly.
Women's nature is to enjoy, that is why they cannot discriminate between good and bad. Because of this reason there are very few women who remain pure and clean. Unfortunately a pure and clean woman can also be publicly abused because of ignorance of her conduct. There is no cure for this except always following good conduct and to understand appropriate conduct."
Brahmaa Jee said - "It is very necessary for a noble woman that she must not let create a chance for herself to become publicly abused. The best ornament of a noble woman is to be together with her husband. Whose husband has gone out to some other land, she should wear only necessary good clothes and ornaments, she should not specially get ready, not sleep alone, not spend too much money, wish for his well being and safely return home. She should not go to her relatives at that time, and if one has to go then she should go with the permission of her elders and along with trusted people When her husband has come back then with happy mood, she should get ready with special clothes and ornaments and entertain him with good tasty food.
With whoever woman her husband is always angry and does not respect her, she is considered unfortunate. She is not unfortunate by her cast or anything, she is like that only with her own behavior.
Created by Sushma Gupta on 3/15/05
Updated on 05/25/13