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General Jokes-28

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General Jokes-28

1. A Quick Thinker!

A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands money. Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replied, "Yes Sir, I did." The robber then shoots him in the temple, killing him instantly. He then turns to a couple standing next to him and asks the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did."


2. Who is On the Shop?

There was a man who was very hard working. He had a shop to run for his family. He had four sons. Once he fell ill, and there was no hope for his lifeHis all family members were standing beside his bed and were eager to hear his last words. In the meantime he called his eldest son. The eldest son was standing just beside him, so he immediately responded - Yes, father?" The son waited for a few moments for his father to say something, that his father would speak something , but he did not.

After a brief pause he called his second son. he was also there holding his right hand, so he also responded immediately - "Yes, father?" He was also expecting him to speak something to him, but he did not. After a brief pause he called his third son. the third son thought maybe his two elder brothers were useless that is why his father did not say anything to them, and has called him, so he immediately said - "Yes, father?" But he also got disappointed when he did not say anything to him too.

After a long pause, he called his fourth son, his youngest son. he had already seen what was happening, so he said in a low voice - "Yes, father?" This time the man shouted - "You all four are here, then who is looking after my shop?"


3. Elephant Act

An Irishman went to London for a visit to the circus. While there, he saw a man with an elephant act. The man claimed the elephant could look at a person and tell that person's age. The Irishman was very skeptical and said so, in no uncertain terms. The man had the elephant look at a small boy and the elephant stamped its foot 9 times.
"Is that right?" he asked the boy.
"Yes, I'm nine!" the boy said.
The Irishman continued his loud heckling, still not believing that this was true.

The man asked the elephant to tell the ages of several other people, and each time the elephant stamped his foot and the people said he was correct.
The Irishman got even louder and more abusive toward the man.

Finally the man could take it no longer and wagered the Irishman that the elephant could look at him and tell him
his age. The Irishman took him up on the wager. The elephant looked real close at the Irishman, turned around, raised his tail and cut wind like you wouldn't believe. Then he turned back around, knocked the Irishman to the ground with his trunk and then stomped on him twice.

The Irishman, crumpled and bleeding, staggered back to his feet and with a sound of disbelief in his voice cried - "Mother of Mary, he's right... Farty-two!"

 

 

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Created by Sushma Gupta On May 27, 2001
Contact: sushmajee@yahoo.com
Modified on 09/23/13