A man came home from work and found that his three children outside, still in their pajamas, re playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall.

In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened.

He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, "My day was OK, but what happened here today?"
She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?"
"Yes," was his incredulous reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."

*WHAT DO WOMEN DO ALL DAY*

Every minute, to and fro,
That's the way my hours go,
Bring me this, take me that,
Feed the dog, put out the cat,
Standing up I eat my toast,
Drink my coffee, thaw the roast,
Sweep the kitchen, wax the floor,
Scrub the woodwork, clean the door,
Scour the bathtub. then myself,
Vacuum carpets, straighten shelves,
Eat a sandwich on the run,
Now my afternoon's begun.
To the soccer game I go,
When will I find time to sew?
Meet the teacher, stop a fight,
See the dentist, change a light,
Help with homework, do the wash,
Iron the clothes, put on the squash,
Shop for groceries, cash a check,
Fight the crowds, now I'm a wreck!

Dinner time it soon will be,
"What's for dinner?" Wait and see!
Dirty dishes fill the sink,
Make some popcorn and a drink,
Will they never go to bed,
Will I never get ahead?
Bring them water, get the light,
Turn off the TV, lock up the bike,
Where's my pillow, say your prayers,
Did you lock the door downstairs?

[It is difficult to count a woman's jobs in a house, still the husband asks - "What did you do whole the day?" - this is a good reply to such husbands.]