1. Our Great Ex-President George Bush
A very careful George Bush was
driving his car very carefully. He saw a newly installed traffic camera in
his city, so when he passed from that point, the camera flashed at him.
George told his co-passenger - "I am going to embarrass the Police
Department. I am absolutely sure that I am well within the speed limit and I
have not ignored red light."
So he went further, turned around and came to the same street again. As he
passed that point again, the camera again winked at him. This time Bush
returned the wink with a great smile, which he called sexy, and went on. he
had fun, so he kept returning, smiling every time when the camera winked,
and asking his co-passenger his speed and signal light and street traffic
signs etc to be his witness.
He did this five times and then with a big loud laugh returned his home. In
a couple of days he received five traffic violation tickets for not wearing
his seat belts.
2. Debt Free
A man came to a hotel, kept a 100 Euro
note on the counter and said to the clerk - "I need a room in this hotel."
"You keep this note, and let me go and see the room first if I like it."
"Perfect." The man went upstairs to see the room.
As the man went upstairs, the clerk
ran to the butcher shop and paid his debt of 100 Euro. The butcher was happy.
The butcher also immediately went to the pig seller and paid his debt. The
pig seller was also very happy.
The pig seller immediately went to the prostitute he went yesterday and paid
his debt to her. The prostitute was also very happy.
The prostitute immediately went to the same hotel, in which the man wanted
to stay, and paid that note to the clerk, saying that she was very grateful
to him to let her have the room yesterday with her client.
In the meantime, the man came down
and said to the hotel clerk - "Sorry, I did not like the room, I want
my note back."
The clerk gave the note back to the man and the man went away.
Thus the whole town was debt-free.
That is what America is doing.
3. Made in USA
This is what a candidate spoke in
USA while making a speech for an up coming election --
"Other than the US $$, nothing is
made in the USA anymore! Actually, this is pretty sad.
John Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (Made in Japan) for 6 am
While his coffeepot (Made in China) was perking,
he shaved with his electric razor (Made in Hong Kong)
He put on a dress shirt (Made in Sri Lanka),
designer jeans (Made in Singapore) and
tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA)
After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA)
he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could
After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN)
to the radio (MADE IN INDIA)
he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY)
filled it with GAS (from Saudi Arabia) and continued his search
for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.
At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day checking his
Computer (Made in Malayesia),
John decided to relax for a while.
He put on his sandals (Made in Brazil),
poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE)
and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA),
and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in AMERICA
AND NOW HE'S HOPING HE CAN GET HELP FROM A PRESIDENT MADE IN KENYA
4. The Gold Urinal
Before Obama was elected President he went to see Bill and Hillary for
some campaign advice, at their spacious home.
After drinking several glasses of iced tea, he asked Bill Clinton if he
could use his personal bathroom. When he entered Clinton's private toilet,
he was astonished to see that Clinton had a solid gold urinal! Wow!
That afternoon, Obama told his wife, Michelle, about the urinal.
"Just think," he said, "when I am President, I too want
to have a gold urinal just like that."
Days later, when Michelle had lunch with Hillary, she told Hillary how
impressed Obama had been at his discovery of the fact that, in his private
bathroom, Bill had a gold urinal.
That evening, when Bill and Hillary were getting ready for bed, Hillary
smiled and said to Bill - ""I found out now who peed in your