Miscellanea | Computer Jokes
1. Computer: Male of Female?
A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike
English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. 'House'
for instance, is feminine: "la casa",
Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.
The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
(THIS GETS BETTER!)
The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('e computador'), because:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
The women won.
Tell this to all the smart women you know...and all the men that have a sense of humor.
2. Another Version of the Above
A language instructor was explaining to her class that in French, nouns unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine.
"House," in French, is feminine-"la maison." "Pencil," in French, is masculine-"le crayon."
One puzzled student asked, "What gender is computer?"
The teacher did not know, and the word wasn't in her French dictionary either. So for fun she split the class into two groups appropriately enough, by gender and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine or feminine noun.
Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation. The women's group decided that computers should be masculine ("le computer"), because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on;
The men's group, however, concluded that computers should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computer"), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic
The men won ;)
3. A Letter to a Computer Savvy Husband
To my darling Husband,
The children are doing well. Tommy is seven now and is a bright, handsome boy. He has developed quite an interest in the arts. He drew a family portrait for a school project. All the figures were good but yours was excellent! The chair and the back of your head are very realistic. You would be very proud of him. Little Jennifer turned three in September. She looks a lot like you did at that age. She is an attractive child and quite smart. She still remembers that you spent the whole afternoon with her on her birthday. What a grand day for Jen, despite the fact that it was stormy and the electricity was out.
I am also doing well. I went blond about a year ago and was delighted to discover that it really is more fun! Lars, I mean Mr. Swenson, the Department Head, has taken an interest in my career and has become a good friend to us all. I have discovered that the household chores are much easier since I realized that you don't mind being vacuumed but that feather dusting made you sneeze. The house is in good shape. I had the living room painted last Spring. I'm not sure if you noticed it. I made sure the painters cut air holes in the drop cloth so you wouldn't be disturbed.
Well, my dear, I must be going. Uncle Lars, Mr. Swenson, I mean, is taking us all on a ski trip and there will be packing to do. I have hired a housekeeper to take care of things while we are away. She'll keep things in order, fill your coffee cup, and bring meals to your desk, - just the way you like it. I hope you and the PC have a lovely time while we are gone. Tommy, Jen and I will think of you often. Try to remember us while your disks are booting.
4. Software Engineer and His Wife...
Husband - hey dear, I am logged in...
Wife - "Would you like to have some snacks?"
Wife - "Have you brought the Saaree?"
Wife - "But I told you about it in morning...
Wife - "Hey Bhagavaan! OK, forget about Saaree, where's your salary?"
Wife - "OK, at least give me your credit card, I can do some
shopping, and will buy my Saaree myself..."
Wife - "Uff, This is my greatest mistake to marry you..."
Wife - "You are completely useless.."
Wife - "OK, let us change the topic, who was there with you in
the car this morning?"
Wife - "What is my value in your life?"
Wife - "OK, tell me do you love me or your computer?"
Wife - "I will go to my Dad's house.."
Wife - "I will leave you forever..."
Wife - "It is simply worthless talking to you..
Wife - "I am going now..."
Have a Nice day... :) ;-)
5. Funny Wrong Email Address Story
One day, a husband got a job out of town. After he was there, he then proceed to check in to a local hotel. He got a PC with internet facilities in his room. He then write an email to notify his wife happily. Unfortunately, without realizing that he had wrongly typed his wife email address he sent it to a wrong email address.
At the other place, a woman who got that wrong email message, had just come back from the funeral of her husband. She then checked her email to read the condolences mails. At the first email she opened, she immediately fell unconscious. And so her first son was shocked too and fell to the ground after reading that email. Know what she got? Here's the email
To : My lovely wife
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Created by Sushma Gupta on May 27, 2001
Modified on 09/24/13